So, there’s been a variety of guy-drama going down in the past few months, and it’s been a bit of a complete wreck. Like a total fucking mess. I wish I could undo some things, and I think I misread some situations and realized too late that certain things would actually matter. Also, alcohol, used incorrectly, is a dangerous thing.

I could say a lot about it, but for various reasons discretion is required and because it’s not classy or ladylike to blab about these sorts of things (not that I usually describe myself in those terms) and because I honestly just sort of don’t want to talk about it, all I can really say is that I’m really starting to realize that I have a lot to learn about relationships and such, especially considering that I’m not really a kid anymore.

I’ve always shunned those teen magazines and Cosmopolitan and that sort of stuff with their articles about dating and “ASK A GUY” sections and advice columns. And I’m sure I’ve also ragged on self-help books and just corny stuff in general. I know I’ve always had a sort of fierce pride about not being dependent on other people. And I think most people who know me would agree that I have a very obvious aversion to being vulnerable, probably to my own detriment.

But at the same time, I’ve always said, even when I’m feeling like a complete gunner about work, that at the end of the day I never want to be a complete workaholic and that my personal life is important, more so than my career. I guess my point is, I think it’s time I started figuring things out that don’t have to do with banking regulations, law, coding errors, organizational systems for research or logic puzzles. I’m not really sure how to go about doing this, but I guess acknowledging the issue is step one. I think.

This entry was posted on Sunday, March 7th, 2010 at 2:37 am and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.